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03.02.2015 03:57
, an epidemio antworten

<P>Not Your Father's America</P>
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<P>A surgeon who specializes in separating conjoined celebrities said today that he had been unable to separate actor Brad Pitt and actress Angelina Jolie, the latest Hollywood couple to be afflicted with the condition.</P>
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<P>Dr. Davis Logsdon made the announcement at the University of Minnesota Medical Center after an eighteen hour procedure to separate the couple failed.</P>
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<P>"We employed every measure known to medical science," said a visibly exhausted Dr. Logsdon. "But we have come to the conclusion that the couple known as 'Brangelina' is, for all intents and purposes, inseparable."</P>
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<P>Mr. Pitt and Ms. Jolie are just the latest example of what some in the medical community are calling an epidemic of conjoined celebrities, a condition in which two celebrities appear to share no major organs in common but are inseparable nonetheless.</P>
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<P>But unlike other conjoined celebrities, Mr. Pitt and Ms. Jolie drew the attention of Dr. Logsdon because of growing sentiment around the world that the ubiquitous photos of the couple building sand castles and playing with Ms. Jolie's countless children had to be stopped.</P>
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<P>While Dr. Logsdon was disappointed that the medical procedure to separate the two celebrities failed, he did offer one glimmer of hope.</P>
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<P>"Sometimes this condition goes away on its own," Dr. Logsdon said. "Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes appeared inseparable right before their summer movies came out, but since then, not so much."</P>
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<P>Elsewhere, United Nations ambassador John Bolton was evicted from his New York apartment building today after reportedly frightening residents by telling them that "if the building lost ten stories it would not make a big difference."</P>
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<P>Math for Believers: 'Deometry' is Hot Subject for Fall</P>
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<P>Forget about isosceles triangles and the Pythagorean Theorem they're square. The hottest trend in high school math these days is deometry, the study of how the Creator created points, lines, angles, shapes and proofs. While critics decry the entry of religion into math class, fans of the new teaching method maintain that by giving God a primary role in geometry and other fields of mathematics, they are merely restoring balance to an area that has sought to remove all vestiges of religion from the public polygon.</P>
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<P>Today's Boston Globe features a piece by Gelbspan titled "Katrina's Real Name" in which he writes: "The hurricane that struck Louisiana yesterday was nicknamed Katrina by the National Weather Service. Its real name is global warming. When the year began with a two foot snowfall in Los Angeles, the cause was global warming.</P>
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<P>"When 124 mile an hour winds shut down nuclear plants in Scandinavia and cut power to hundreds of thousands of people in Ireland and the United Kingdom, the driver was global warming. When a severe drought in Wholesale Handbags the Midwest dropped water levels in the Missouri River to their lowest on record earlier this summer, the reason was global warming. In July, when the worst drought on record triggered wildfires in Spain and Portugal and left water levels in France at their lowest in 30 years, the explanation was global warming.</P>
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<P>"When a lethal heat wave in Arizona kept temperatures above 110 degrees and killed more than 20 people in one week, the culprit was global warming. To date, the Library has opened 51,285 pages of records relating to Judge John G. Roberts.</P>
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<P>In processing requests, the Library followed its standard search procedure by searching for Roberts records using his name. During the expedited processing of these records, the Library noticed a code, "CU AT 18," associated with tracking sheets in the Roberts materials. The Library ran a search on that code, and on Monday, August 29, discovered a large volume of White House Office of Records Management Subject case files that were entered into the system only by the code for John Roberts (instead of his name). Some of these materials will be duplicative of previously opened files.</P>
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<P>The Library is now in the process of determining what documents within these case files relate to John Roberts. Parents, teachers, grandparents, and concerned citizens are planning Leave My Child Alone back to school events from September 7 to 30.</P>
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<P>Stem cell research is forging ahead, and funded by the feds. "Adult" stem cell research, using these amazingly versatile Wholesale Bags cells taken harmlessly from umbilical replica oakleys cord blood and adults, is leading to cures in dozens of clinical trials funded by the federal government.</P>
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<P>And there is no embryo research "ban." There isn't even a "ban" on funding. In fact, President Bush is the first president ever to use federal funds for research on embryos.</P>
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<P>In that famous August 2001 speech, he liberalized existing policy and was criticized by some Christian conservatives for doing so. He announced funding for research on cell lines from embryos that already had been destroyed. It was a principled compromise, and the National Institutes of Health is now spending Wholesale Sunglasses tens of millions of dollars every year following through although, despite the hype, we are a long, long way from any "cures" using embryo stem cells.</P>
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<P>The current fight is about whether to use federal dollars to fund experiments using "spare" embryos from in vitro clinics. There is no federal law preventing researchers from using the embryos with private funding. The president has promised to veto a bill that would overturn his compromise and force taxpayers who believe using human embryos Cheap Wholesale Sunglasses for medical research is a grave wrong to fund it.</P>
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<P>There is much interest in "alternative" ways of getting embryonic type or "pluripotent" stem cells (cells that can become any type of tissue in the body) ways that don't involve destroying embryos.</P>
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<P>Most published scientific research papers are wrong, according to a new analysis. Assuming that the new paper is itself correct, problems with experimental and statistical methods mean that there is less than a 50% chance that the results of any randomly chosen scientific paper are true.</P>
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<P>John Ioannidis, an epidemiologist at the University of Ioannina School of Medicine in Greece, says that small sample sizes, poor study design, researcher bias, and selective reporting and other problems combine buy replica oakley to make most research findings false. But even large, well designed studies are not always right, meaning that scientists and the public have to be wary of reported findings.</P>
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<P>"We should accept that most research findings will be refuted. Some will be replicated and validated. The replication process is more important than the first discovery," Ioannidis says.</P>
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<P>In the paper, Ioannidis does not show that any particular findings are false. Instead, he shows statistically how the many obstacles to getting research findings right combine to make most published research wrong.</P>

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